How to Handle Anger in a Healthy Way
Not all anger is the same. Did you know that there are healthy and unhealthy ways to manage your anger?
Sometimes it’s good and right to be furious about something. Getting angry is not always wrong. For example, positive change can come from being angry at injustice or inequality. Righteous or justified anger from being mistreated can be a great motivator for change. Anger can inspire us to stand up for ourselves or a cause we believe in.
But if you’ve had bad experiences of anger, for example, poor role models in your childhood, you might only see anger as destructive, scary and uncontrollable. But learning how to manage anger, so you can be in control of angry feelings, can have a positive effect on your relationships and your life. Here are some expert strategies to help you manage your anger.
Know what you’re dealing with
Understanding why you’re angry and where it’s coming from is key. Maybe you’re stressed and grumpy, fatigued, or unwell. Or perhaps the reason for your anger is apparent.
Once you understand your anger and its sources, you can start to deal with it.
Write it down
Turning your feelings into words is a powerful act. Just write whatever comes into your head, even if it doesn’t make sense.
The act of writing down your thoughts stops them from running in circles in your head and gets them out in the open. Seeing them written down they might not even seem so big or insurmountable. You might even begin to see patterns, so you can understand what triggers your angry feelings.
Take some action
Once you know what’s making you angry, you can plan how to work around it. Be aware of your triggers and minimize them as best you can That can mean making sure you eat properly to avoid blood sugar crises, getting enough sleep, and exercise and taking time out for self-care.
You won’t be able to avoid being angry sometimes, but if you take control and put yourself in charge you should find yourself less vulnerable to anger and frustration.
Brooding on the cause of your anger is actively unhelpful. It keeps you stuck in those negative feelings, keeps you stuck in victim mode, and keeps you powerless.
Brooding is also bad for your blood pressure and keeps you stewing in adrenaline and cortisol, the fight or flight stress hormones which are excellent in an emergency but damaging to have with you all the time.
Don’t rehash your anger
Talking over your problems can be helpful if you share with a trusted friend. But be careful to keep it focused, or you might end up rehashing your troubles over and over again. Like brooding, complaining can keep you from moving forward and finding solutions to your problems.
For professional help with managing your anger please talk to me about my four-session behavioural transformation course. It helps you to deal with anger in a new way and gives you tools to continue to keep anger under control for good. You can call Judy at The Body Matters on (01702 714968) to find out more.